What to Do When You’re Feeling Hopeless or Suicidal | JED

What to Do When You’re Feeling Hopeless or Thinking About Suicide

Important Takeaways icon

Important Takeaways

  • Feeling hopeless or having thoughts of suicide can happen when we experience a lot of pain or numbness, but those feelings are temporary and can get better with the right support.

  • Hopelessness can show up as thinking things will never improve, focusing only on the negative, or pulling away from people and activities you used to enjoy.

  • Telling someone how you’re feeling is a brave first step toward getting help. You don’t have to struggle alone, and reaching out can bring relief and hope.

Sometimes we experience so much pain, loss, or numbness that we start to feel hopeless — like there is no way out of how we’re feeling. When we feel hopeless or overwhelmed, we may start to have thoughts of suicide. Suicidal thoughts are temporary, and with the right treatment and support you can begin to feel so much better — even hopeful. You’ve come to the right place to find out how.

If you or someone you know needs to talk to someone right now, text, call, or chat 988 for a free confidential conversation with a trained counselor 24/7. 

You can also contact the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741-741.

If this is a medical emergency or if there is immediate danger of harm, call 911 and explain that you need support for a mental health crisis.

What Hopelessness Feels Like

  • Thinking or saying that things will never improve. It may include thoughts such as:
    • “This will never get better.”
    • “No one can help me.”
    • “I feel like giving up.”
    • “It’s too late now.”
  • Making negative experiences bigger. For example, if you fail a test at school and then think of yourself as a failure as opposed to focusing on the fact that you failed one test.
  • Ignoring positive feelings or experiences. In the test example, maybe you’ve had a lot of success in the class, but you can’t tap into those feelings of accomplishment. Instead, the one bad test makes the whole experience feel bad.  
  • Imagining the worst-case scenario. Experts call this “catastrophizing,” and it means when something bad happens — let’s stick with the test example — you imagine the worst thing that could happen as a result: “I failed the test, so I am going to fail out of school.” 
  • Not being interested in activities or events that once brought you joy.
  • Feeling isolated and alone, or pulling away from friends and family.
  • Blaming yourself for how you feel or believing that somehow the challenges you are experiencing are your fault.

Find out more about hopelessness and how you can feel better.

What Suicidal Thoughts Feel Like

Suicidal thoughts can range from passing thoughts about death (such as wondering what it feels like to die or thinking, “What if I just went to sleep and didn’t wake up?”) to specific plans about suicide (such as thinking about how and when you might end your life). Passing thoughts of suicide can get worse if you don’t get support for them. If you are struggling with any of the below feelings or behaviors, it is time to reach out.

  • Feeling disconnected from others or withdrawing from friends and family.
  • Feeling trapped in an intolerable situation.
  • Feeling like a burden to others or telling others they would be better off without you.
  • Thinking, talking, or posting online about death or violence.

Learn more warning signs of suicide.

It’s Time to Take Action and Feel Better

Telling someone you are having thoughts about suicide is a brave act, and it can be difficult to do. Sharing your feelings is important, though, because it is the first step toward finding help. If you feel suicidal, you are likely feeling hopeless or helpless. Connecting with someone and sharing your feelings can help you feel supported and give you hope. It can be a huge relief to share your feelings, because it means you no longer have to struggle alone.

To hear from other young people who have been where you are now and found their way forward, check out It’s OK to Say Suicide.

Visit JED’s Suicide Resource Center to find out everything you need to know to get help or help someone else. 

Video: You’re Not Alone

 

FAQ icon

Frequently Asked Questions

What does hopelessness feel like?

Hopelessness can feel like things will never get better, no one can help, or it’s too late to change anything. You may also lose interest in things you used to enjoy or pull away from friends and family. Learn more about why you may feel hopeless and when to seek help for feelings of hopelessness.

What’s the difference between passing thoughts of suicide and something more serious?

Passing thoughts may be wondering what it feels like to die, while more serious thoughts involve specific plans about how or when. If you’re having any thoughts of suicide, it’s important to reach out for support before they get worse. Learn more about suicidal thoughts and when to seek help.

Is it normal to feel like a burden to others?

Feeling like a burden is a common sign of suicidal thinking, but it’s not the truth — people in your life care about you. If you’re feeling that way, it’s a sign to talk to someone you trust or seek professional mental health help. Learn more about the warning signs of suicide.

What should I do if I'm having thoughts of suicide?

This is a sign to talk to someone you trust or seek professional mental health help. If you or someone you know needs to talk to someone right now, text, call, or chat 988 for a free confidential conversation with a trained counselor 24/7. You can also contact the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741-741. If this is a medical emergency or if there is immediate danger of harm, call 911 and explain that you need support for a mental health crisis. Sharing your feelings is the first step toward feeling better and getting the support you need.

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If you or someone you know needs to talk to someone right now, text, call, or chat 988 for a free confidential conversation with a trained counselor 24/7. 

You can also contact the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741-741.

If this is a medical emergency or if there is immediate danger of harm, call 911 and explain that you need support for a mental health crisis.