How your social feed can shape you
Important Takeaways
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Social media algorithms prioritize your attention, not how you feel. They learn what keeps you watching and show you more of it, which can change what feels normal.
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Your social media feed shows highlight reels, not the whole picture. Comparing your everyday life to other people’s wins, achievements, and polished moments can leave you feeling anxious or worse about yourself.
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You can shape your feed to support your mental health. Mute or unfollow accounts that make you feel less than, engage with content that inspires you, and ask who benefits when a post makes you feel like you’re not enough.
By Dillon St. Bernard
Ever notice that after 20 minutes scrolling on your phone, you somehow feel worse than when you picked it up? Maybe everyone in your feed suddenly seems richer, stronger, or more successful than you. Maybe video after video seems to suggest there’s something wrong with you that you need to fix. Maybe you feel addicted to the screen, or have realized your phone is causing anxiety.
That feeling isn’t an accident. Algorithms are meant to keep us scrolling so that we see as many ads as possible, and the net result is that we often feel worse or drained afterwards. The good news is there are ways to shape your feeds so they support your mental health instead of working against it.
How the algorithm works
The more you use social media, the more the app learns what holds your attention and keeps sending you more and more of it. That could be anything from sports content to fitness advice to relationship tips or videos about making money. Over time, a feed focused on what keeps you watching can change what feels normal. So for example, if you watch a video that gives you gambling advice, it’ll keep feeding you more and more content about gambling, until it feels like everyone must be doing it.
The algorithm (and the company business model) is built on keeping you engaged, even when the content doesn’t make you feel good. You might even feel that you are addicted to social media or your phone’s screen.
The trap
Have you ever felt like a post or ad read your mind, like it knew exactly what you were looking for? That’s not a coincidence. Behind the scenes, the app is collecting data about what you spend time looking at, telling it more and more about you and what you might be interested in.
Advertisers and influencers use that data to sell you things, pull you down rabbit holes, spread misinformation, and play on your emotions.
If something in your feed leaves you feeling angry, anxious, alone, or like everyone else has life figured out except you, pay attention to that feeling. Sometimes, you might even feel like you’re addicted to your phone or social media. If you can, when you notice it again, scroll past the content you’re seeing, whether it’s the gambling video that makes financial success look easy for everyone but you, or the influencer selling a product they swear will make you finally feel happy with your body.
Remember, too, that feeds show highlight reels: wins, achievements, and polished versions of people’s lives, not the whole picture. Comparing your everyday to someone else’s highlight reel will always feel bad.
How to take back your feed
You have the power to take control of your feed. Start with some of these ideas:
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- Be intentional about who you follow. Notice which accounts consistently leave you feeling energized and connected, and which ones leave you feeling inadequate, angry, pressured, or like you have to become someone else. Unfollow or mute the second group.
- Engage with content that makes you feel inspired. Your algorithm will learn from these actions and start suggesting similar posts.
- When content makes a bold claim or gives information you’re not sure of, look into it before you trust or share it. Check whether more than one credible source is reporting it, look for named experts or credentials, and see if you can find the same claim on a reputable website (like a .org or .edu). If you’re not sure where to start, ask a teacher, librarian, or trusted adult how to check a source.
- When something makes you feel like you’re not enough, ask yourself this question: Who benefits from me believing this?
Remember: your feed will always try to shape what you pay attention to and what you believe. But you have the power to decide what kind of person you want to be, whose voices deserve influence in your life, and what actually matters to you.
Frequently Asked Questions
Why do I feel worse after scrolling on my phone?
Your social media feed can make it seem like everyone else is more successful, or suggest there’s something about you that needs fixing. It can affect your mental health, body image, and more. Algorithms are designed to keep you scrolling so you see more ads, which can leave you feeling drained or anxious.
How do social media algorithms shape what I see?
Social media algorithms learn what holds your attention and keep suggesting more of that content. Over time, repeatedly seeing the same kinds of posts can change what feels normal and even change how you feel offline.
Why can comparing myself to others on social media make me feel bad?
Social media feeds show people’s highlight reels, not the whole picture of their lives. Comparing your everyday experiences to those curated moments can make it feel like everyone else has life figured out except you. Learn more about comparison on social media.
How can I make my social media feed better for my mental health?
Be intentional about who you follow, and mute or unfollow accounts that leave you feeling less than, angry, anxious, or like you need to become someone else. Engage with content that inspires you so your algorithm learns to suggest more posts like it. Learn more about how social media can impact your mental health and how to protect your well-being while scrolling.
How can I check whether information on social media is trustworthy?
Before trusting or sharing a claim, check whether credible sources back it up. Look for named experts, and see whether the same information is on a reputable website, like a nonprofit or university. When you’re unsure where to start, ask a teacher, librarian, or trusted adult for help checking the source. Learn more about how to combat misinformation online.
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