Understanding Apathy | JED

Understanding Apathy

If you are feeling empty or numb, you might be experiencing apathy. It’s helpful to understand where feelings of apathy stem from. That way, you can find strategies to feel more engaged in your life, and ultimately, feel better.

What Is Apathy?

If you are feeling uninterested in your relationships, unmotivated at work, uninterested in school, or just feeling empty and you don’t know why, you may be feeling apathy. Sometimes, apathetic feelings are a result of things you can recognize and change — for example, you might feel apathy at work because your daily tasks are not fulfilling, or you’re no longer attracted to someone you once felt attracted to. But sometimes apathy is a symptom of a larger issue, like trauma, grief, or an underlying mental health condition.

Other examples of apathy include showing up at practice for your sport — but while you are physically there, mentally you are elsewhere and not engaged. Or, going through the motions to get a project done at school, meanwhile it used to be a subject you were passionate about.

What Are Signs of Apathy?

What does apathy feel like? It may make you feel like you are empty — or you may feel nothing at all. Apathy can also cause noticeable changes, such as:

  • Low or no reaction to emotions: Not feeling or expressing emotions, either positive or negative, or feeling indifferent to situations you would normally have a reaction to.
  • Neglecting your responsibilities: Not engaging with work or school — even if there may be negative consequences, such as a poor performance review or bad grade. From the outside, it may look like you are “lazy.”
  • Neglecting your needs: Failing to look after or prioritize self-care, hygiene, diet and exercise, or regular sleep patterns.
  • Difficulty starting or finishing everyday tasks: Not doing chores or homework.
  • Not engaging with others: You might pull away from friends, teachers, classmates, or coworkers. From the outside, it may look like you aren’t interested in other people’s lives.
  • Lack of motivation: You no longer complete goals or make changes to your lifestyle, even if you know they would benefit you.
  • Lack of interest: You might stop doing hobbies that you once enjoyed.
  • Feeling fatigued: You may have low energy and want to sleep more often.

What Causes Apathy?

You may be asking yourself, “Why do I feel empty?” There are many reasons for why you may be struggling with apathy.

Poor self-esteem

If you have a negative self-image or struggle with low self-esteem or feelings of hopelessness, worthlessness, or incompetence, you may begin to feel like your life doesn’t matter. This can be a sign of suicidal thoughts or behaviors, so if you begin to feel this way, it’s important to tell a friend or an adult you trust, and be on the lookout for other changes in your mood and behaviors.

Learn how to tell someone you are thinking about suicide.

A tragic or traumatic event

Experiencing an event like the loss of a loved one, a natural disaster, financial difficulties, getting laid off. or failing out of school can make you feel lost, sad, scared, or isolated — and may make you question your purpose or the point of life. If you don’t cope with your trauma, you may start to feel apathetic and disconnected from your everyday life as a way to handle the pain.

Trouble adjusting to a new circumstance

An event doesn’t need to be traumatic in order to trigger feelings of apathy. If you’ve experienced a recent change, like changing jobs or changing schools, a breakup, or a fight with a friend, apathy may be a sign that you’re having trouble adjusting to your new situation.

Feeling overwhelmed or burned out

When we don’t feel like our hard work at school, at work, or at home is being acknowledged or rewarded, it’s easy to feel resentful of the people who are not acknowledging us. If you don’t practice self-care while you’re working hard, you can start to feel exhausted and overworked. If you’re feeling overworked, burned out, or unfulfilled by your current lifestyle, you may start to shut down and feel apathetic.

Feeling stuck

We want rewards for the hard work we do, and one of those rewards is feeling stimulated and interested in our own lives. If you are feeling like you’re in a rut at work, in your classes, or in certain relationships, and you can’t immediately leave or change your situation, apathy can quickly take over.

Is Apathy a Mental Illness?

Although apathy on its own is not a diagnosable mental health condition, it may be a symptom of one.

If there are no apparent causes of apathy — for example, you have not gone through a sudden major tragedy or other significant life change — and you still have prolonged feelings of apathy and emptiness that you can’t shake, it’s a good idea to ask for support or reach out to a mental health professional, especially if feeling apathetic is interfering with other areas of your life. Apathy can be a symptom of a larger mental health issue, or related to other mental and physical health issues.

Apathy often occurs at the same time as other aspects of mental health conditions:

  • Anhedonia: Literally meaning “without pleasure,” people with anhedonia no longer enjoy activities that they usually do.
  • Lethargy: People who are lethargic feel abnormally slow, sluggish, heavy, or fatigued. Lethargy can affect people physically and mentally.

Apathy, anhedonia, and lethargy are all symptoms of depression. If you are feeling apathetic and lethargic or another combination of these symptoms, it can be helpful to reach out to a mental health professional.

If you or someone you know needs help right now:

  • Text or call 988 or use the chat function at 988lifeline.org.
  • Text HOME to 741-741 for a free, confidential conversation with a trained counselor any time of day.
  • If this is a medical emergency or there is immediate danger of harm, call 911 and explain that you need support for a mental health crisis.

How to Deal With Feeling Apathetic

If you are wondering how to overcome apathy, a good place to start is by asking yourself some questions about what is causing you to feel this way, either on your own or with the help of a mental health professional:

  • Do I view or talk about myself negatively?
  • Do I remember an event that happened before I started feeling apathetic?
  • Do I feel apathetic in all aspects of my life, or is it a specific situation or environment that makes me feel this way (for example, a class, a task at work, or another responsibility)?
  • If so, what situations am I not apathetic in?
  • Do I feel like I am stuck in a rut?
  • What about my current situation is changeable?
  • Do I feel like my apathy has negatively affected my relationships or my performance at work or school?

Identifying potential root causes of your apathy can help you avoid them — or, if you can’t change them, learn how to react to them differently with healthier coping strategies. If you recognize that your apathy is linked to an event in your life, it may pass after you adjust to your new circumstance. You can also address your apathy by finding a new goal to focus on, like making new friends or searching for a new job.

If at any point your apathetic feelings lead to having suicidal thoughts, such as “What’s the point of being alive?” or “No one would miss me if I died,” it’s time to tell a parent, teacher, or therapist. Any suicidal thoughts, or thoughts about hurting yourself, should be assessed with support from a mental health professional.

How to Help a Friend Who Is Apathetic

If you have noticed a friend or loved one is exhibiting signs of apathy or showing a lack of interest in your relationship, tell them what you’ve noticed, express your concern, and offer your support without judging them. If they tell you that their apathetic feelings have included suicidal thoughts, reach out to a trusted adult who can support them or call the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline.

Feel Engaged and Fulfilled Again

Although apathy can feel all-consuming, with the right support, you can feel engaged with life and reconnected to your emotions and relationships. With the help of loved ones and mental health care, as well as small, manageable steps, you can begin to feel more present and become an active participant in your life once again.

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If you or someone you know needs to talk to someone right now, text, call, or chat 988 for a free confidential conversation with a trained counselor 24/7. 

You can also contact the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741-741.

If this is a medical emergency or if there is immediate danger of harm, call 911 and explain that you need support for a mental health crisis.